Hi All!

OK, first of all, I have no idea how to post pics here from my iPhone..yes, I am a maroon!  So if anyone can walk me through how to do that (wireless would be best!  I hate connecting anything to my old sort-of-borrowed laptop!), I would be eternally grateful

My mom and dad were married for nearly 40 years, both common-law and legally, and they finally got their official, long-awaited Catholic ceremony in her hospital room several months before she passed away, in January of 2006.  My dad passed in December of 2010, so I can present this dilemma to neither one of them.

Anyway..my mother's original wedding band is a heavy, Florentined, 18KWG 6mm band set with 5 10-pt diamonds. She loved it, although she became allergic to it and often wore a ring-shaped rash in place of her wedding ring I pink puffy heart love it, always have, and wear it on the middle finger of my right hand nearly every day.  I intend to someday will it to my older daughter, who is now nearly 6 years old, and the only one of my children to meet either of my parents. (My father unfortunately became violent before dying of Alzheimer's, and living cross-country, I was unable to visit him with the girls before he passed.)  Dad bought Mom a second wedding ring that she LOVED for their religious ceremony.  It's a small marquise cut (maybe 1/3 carat?) in 14KYG with channel-set brilliants as accents, and has a wrap of slighter larger brilliants.  He got it at a warehouse-type store back in 2005 for about $800.  Look on any Craigslist "jewelry for sale" posting, and you'll see a similar style ring.

I don't care for marquise diamonds.  Mom and I both have/had peasant-type hands with short, stubby nails (didn't keep us from being cuckoo about rings, however), and that wasn't a good shape for either of us.  I don't like channel settings, as a rule.  I hate wraps.  And I only wear yellow gold if it's a high carat, in a two-tone setting, or otherwise a piece I really dig.  I don't like this ring  

Dilemma #1) Mom loved it.  She wanted a different style than ring #1, and she certainly got it!

Dilemma #2) I don't care for marquise.  East-west sounds interesting, though.  And I would like to keep the stones for sentimental reasons.  It's not valuable enough to sell and use the money toward something else nice to enjoy and then pass down to Daughter #2, though, even if I could tone down my Sentimental Fool and have the ring revamped.

Dilemma #3) The stones aren't great.  DBL uses great melee stones, but I think if I am going to trust anyone with this ring, I want it to be David.  I don't want to "insult" anyone by wasting their talent on anything less, though. 

So, what do I do? An appraisal, to see what the stones are?  I keep looking at the ring and picturing my mom..but she was anything but a wasteful person, and I do think she'd want me to enjoy what she left to me.  She made a really big point of the fact that I was to get all of her jewelry.

Any ideas??

I'm afraid if you have your rings appraised and it is confirmed in your mind that the stones are not perfect, you will dislike it even more. I don't know if that's something you should tempt the fates with. However, here's my two cents on your dilemma:

#1. Mom loved it but that doesn't mean you have to nor should you feel guilty about not feeling the same way about it. Moms are fantastic at understanding their children will (usually) have different taste than them. I'm sure your mom would have understood as well.

#2. There's nothing wrong with researching your options. The rings GIAGirl posted look fabulous. I have peasanty hands too and I think an E-W setting would give good coverage. Or, you could turn all the stones into a necklace - maybe a DBTY type necklace with the marquise as your center and alternating the different brilliant sizes?  You don't have to leave a ring for each of them. Perhaps if it were made into something different, then you would want to wear it and both your girls would get pieces you loved and wore every day. All they will care about in the end is that they received something special from you.

#3. I would trust David to fix my jewelry into something I loved. I haven't had the pleasure of purchasing from him yet but from reading this forum and how happy the regulars are with him, I wouldn't hestiate to ask him if there is anything he could do.  

LOL! A pint of plasma, you say???

I too absolutely love the setting that GIAGirl posted (she has exquisite taste, you can always count on her at moments like this. )

I actually saw one very similar on a woman in the queue in front of me in a coffee shop last week and I was struck with envy. Hers didn't have the filigree, it was just very sleek metal all over, but oh, how I coveted it. 

You might want to keep the original setting intact when you remove the marquise, wrap and all. That way, your daughter will one day have the option of wearing her grandmother's stone in your setting or the original - it's funny how things that one generation don't love are sought after by the next...  That said, if you want to put the rest of the stones into a band, it isn't really something that would date, so your daughter would be able to wear that happily too. You really do have options here.

I personally wouldn't go down the appraisal route - it isn't like you're still in a return period here, and the point is that the value of the stones is sentimental. They're irreplaceable, whatever their characteristics.

Mostly, I'm just sorry that you've lost your mom, it sounds as though you were close. I'm glad you'll be able to wear and enjoy her jewelry.

First of all, I am so sorry for the loss of both of your parents.

I agree about not getting an appraisal because at this point it wouldn't do you much good.  If you are curious how big the stone is or something like that I am sure a jeweler would be happy to guestimate color and that for you while building your new piece.

I wouldn't count on using the little melee though.  Probably a lot of reasons why but I know they can break while removing or sometimes resizing.  I have an old channel sit my husband gave me years ago, and when I had it resized down, one of the little diamonds broke and they had to replace it.  Then I had to argue with them about how could they use way inferior quality of a diamond once they did fix it because it was obviously yellow (I had G/H stones and this one had to be like a K)   Anyway I would focus only on the marquise.

I would also keep the ring intact.  You never know what others might want to do with it.  I'm pretty sure I know what setting you are talking about and while not my cup of tea either, you never know who would love it as it is.

You guys are the best!  All definitely ideas to consider.  If I can swing a way to come out to NYC this fall, maybe I'll just pack the ring with me =)

OMC, I had to look up "Chopard Happy Diamonds"- pretty nifty concept!  Sort of a redundant name, though, don't you think? Diamonds=happy.  Makes me think of chocolate diamonds.  It's chocolate...it's a diamond..it's...time to go have something healthy for breakfast, because when you're about to hit 40, you want your diamond to look like a cushion, not your rear view...

Do you think you could love the ring as a pendant?

Remove the shank and add a bail (or two jump rings on either side). Have the shank gold used in the bail or clasp and a simple chain.

Pendants like that read "close to my heart" to me.

I agree, that's a great idea!  Though I hear recycling gold isn't cheap to do.  It probably wouldn't be too hard to do the rest of it though.

Last try:

I am going against the grain a bit here... I say, why be afraid of knowing what the center stone really is? Debangel, you mother cherished the ring, regardless of its retail/resale value. Knowing the center stone's stats and street-worth should not change how YOU feel about the piece. After all, this ring is all about family love and a mother-daughter connection, not what stones and metal is worth to someone outside your family. It sounds like your mother understood this.

I have my grandmother's dinky-do engagement ring. It is small, worn, and not at all unusual or remarkable. And, honestly I do not know any specific history regarding the ring, or, how my grandmother or grandfather FELT about the ring because I never knew it existed until I inherited the piece (knowing that your mother cherished her ring puts you one-up on me, Debangel). However, I had my grandmother's ring appraised, and I am glad to know exactly what the center stone is. In fact, knowing what it is makes me appreciate the piece even MORE... the ring came to my grandmother when she was very, very young and when times were very different. As Mrs. M. suggested, if I ever decide to reset the diamond, I will keep the original setting, along with its matching wedding band, to pass along to family. Also, as far as estate matters go, it doesn't hurt to know what the ring actually is.

For me, knowing the center diamond's stats provide the all-important measurements... critical in evaluating new setting designs. This is even more critical with a fancy shape like a marquise... where there are far more variables, than a round brilliant, for example. Furthermore, knowing the diamond's weight, color and clarity, in addition to its size, make it easier to evaluate reset options in terms of what is most desirable and practical budget-wise and materials-wise.

Debangel, I see marvelous potential for all sorts of designs with your marquise diamond. An E-W format could be stunning in either a modern or traditional style... I love the two suggestions posted by GIAGirl. Moreover, I could see a wonderful cluster style ring; halo (with either colorless or colored diamonds or gemstones); split shank; or a bypass design (perhaps, with a symbolic gemstone).

It will be exciting to see what you decide to do...