Why? Just, why?

[Mrs Mitchell]

So I went into town at lunchtime, did a little shopping and got a manicure.

I come home and I'd just tried on my lovely new printed silk shirt (carefully, nails enamel still a little wet) and decided it would look best with a little pencil skirt and some strappy wedge sandals. I'm standing in the house, all done up in this new super-feminine, delicate outfit, admiring it from different angles, when the doorbell rings.

Want to know how I smudged my manicure?

Helping the truck driver get the lid off the septic tank for its annual de-sludge and inspection.

I got something unspeakable in my shared prongs, too.

[oldmancoyote]

Pass the bean dip, would you?

[Mrs Mitchell]

Sure. I'll wash my hands first, shall I?

[ah2bqat]

   Erck!   

[Diamondsbylauren]

Oh Jen.....

send the shared prong back and we'll be happy to decontaminate it..heheheh

[Trinkette]

Yes, some bean dip for me too, please. The little detail about the shared prong was a nice touch, Mrs. M...  I'm sure it will be a first for DBL to clean THAT.   

Sorry to hear about your manicure. I've given up that sort of luxury myself – too many days like yours have taught me that you just can't fool (or otherwise beautify or cover) Mother Nature's nails with polish... something ALWAYS happens to undo your best intentions (thereby flushing your hard earned $$$ down the toilet into the septic... hey, wait... isn't that what started all this...?). Geeesh. 

[Mrs Mitchell]

Trinkette, I'm at the giving up on it stage too! It just seems a tad unfair. The tank gets emptied once a year. I get a manicure maybe 8 or 10 times a year. Surely it wasn't too much to ask that these things didn't coincide? I mean, what was the actual probability of that happening? It seems low.

Looks like I can beat the odds for this sort of horrible thing, yet can I match these six winning lottery numbers reliably? Well, no.

David, I think the laws about what you can send by airfreight  would stop me taking advantage of that kind offer.

It's mostly grass and moss in the prongs, honestly!

[ah2bqat]

Sure, and we're believing THAT, Miz M.  Better get that waterpic out, soonest. 

I, too, have given up on nail polish, but still get manicures and pedicures - only I get the nails buffed.  No polish to remove or destroy before its time.   

[annie1]

Priceless Jen, just priceless... 

[Mikla]

Now I remember why I haven't had my tank emptied in three years . . .  ugh!  Very funny story, Jen!

Mikla

[GIAGirl]

Remind me not to make this my second profession.   Yuck!

[Mrs Mitchell]

Mikla, I know it's a revolting thing to think about, but I learned the hard way shortly after I moved here, this is not something you want to tackle on an emergency basis. Truly!

[Diamondsbylauren]

This reminds me of a joke...which I can't remember right now.

However I do remember the one about the guy who got a job circumcising elephants.
The pay was terrible, but the tips? Tremendous...
I'm sorry about that one......

[Mrs Mitchell]

Oh dear.

Well, I only have myself to blame - I started this horrible thread!

[ah2bqat]

This reminds me of a joke...which I can't remember right now.

Are you thinking about the guy who's job was to sweep up pachederm poo after the circus parade thru downtown each time the circus moved to a new place?...and when asked why he stayed with such a horrible job, he blinked and asked, ' What, and give up show biz?' 

[webmistress]

No fair! All gussied up and you have to bond with a septic tank.

[Foxylady]

Poor you Mrs M, you could always do what I do and do your own nails, I pedicure once a month, and manicure one a week, so I have lovely nails 24/7. All it costs is a little me time and the price of good quality nail polish oh and a dvd and a bottle of wine, so it really is a me time thing.

Foxylady 

[ah2bqat]

Lordy, Foxy.  I seem to be following you all over the forum tonight.        I'd love to be young enough to still be able to see my toenails clearly enough to polish them.  Even with my nose between my knees, the details escape me...add in a bottle of wine and boy howdy, I'm not sure I'd care how good or bad they ended up looking.  We'd sure have a good time of it, though.
 

[Foxylady]

ah2bqat

That's the reason for the Bottle of Wine at least if I make a mess, I won't notice until the next day 

Foxylady

[ah2bqat]

Foxy, if you were close enough, I'd invite you over to share a gin and cran with Stitch and myself.

[Foxylady]

ah2bqat

Where about's in the USA are you from? Believe me I'd be there right now if I could. 

Foxylady 

[ah2bqat]

Down in SoCal, Foxy.  2 blocks from the beach and 2 blocks from a street of restuarants and boutiques.  Truly the best of 2 worlds.

[Mrs Mitchell]

Foxy, I gave up on the DIY manicures a looooong time back. The mess I can make with nail polish has to be seen to be believed, truly! I'm beyond dreadful at it.